Chet The Scribe

My name is Chet Meeks. I am a 32 year old sociologist. I started this blog so that I can write about the things that interest me. I hope you enjoy it.

Monday, November 27, 2006

Autumn and Melancholia: Tache's Return

Dear "People":

Chet thought that he could encrypt his password and keep me from writing. But as I have tried to explain to him, I write not because I wish to write, but because I must write. Chet does not understand this, because he is thick-headed, and because he is not a writer.

Last week we were visited by Exhibits A and B of Chet's psychopathology: Asa and Heidi Meeks. It was a veritable Oedipal orgy around here -- enough sublimated anxiety and unrequited desire to choke a horse. And also, way too much niceness!

Asa and Heidi arrived Tuesday evening and Chet made dinner for them. When, I ask, does Chet ever make dinner for me???!!! I did not punish you as a child, Chet; nor did I instill in you all the neurotic energy needed to supply a small city with electricity during the month of December. Those nervous habits you have -- they didn't come from me! Yet Asa and Heidi get green curry shrimp? What an ingrate!

Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday, I had to witness something truly disturbing: Asa & Heidi taking turns RUBBING CHET'S FEET. Chet believes that the "toxins are collecting" in his feet. There's enough in that one statement to keep New York's best analyst busy for a year. I tell you -- I wish I could bottle and sell parental guilt. Dear Asa and Heidi, let me tell you something -- this child of yours would have turned out bonkers no matter how you raised him. I don't know why on earth you would allow yourselves to be cajoled into being Chet's servant, but stop it! We're talking about someone who used to chew off his jacket sleeves with his own teeth! This was long before his oedipal resolution, so trust me, it's not your fault. It's not your fault he's crazy. No amount of foot-rubbing is going to cure what ails Chet.

Fantasy and reality are not separate ontologies. Nor are they antinomies. Rather, fantasy structures reality, yet never in a straightforward way. What we see before us as "real" is always the result of some hidden desire we cannot see. The basis of this fantasy, this desire, then, is the only properly suitable philosophical question. For fantasy is not a thing. It is, rather, the internalization of a loss -- and not a real loss, but rather a hypothetical one -- a melancholic loss. All loss -- of the mother, of love, even of life itself -- is not a real event, but rather only the negative effect of an imagined presence, which combined create desire, and then, reality itself. To put it more plainly, the oedipal drama is not the result of the actual loss of the mother, but rather of her hypothetical and melancholic loss -- the result, that is, of the child's imagining that he ever possessed the mother in the first place, giving rise to all of the desires that plague you poor humans.

What we see before us, then, as the real thing, is not, in fact, a thing. Reality is the result of a double-fantasy -- a fantasy first of having had something, and a fantasy second, of the loss of that something.

Freud (above), of course, never understood this, believing foolishly, as moderns did, far too much in the reality principle. Only dear Gerhard Richter (whose "Family at the Seaside" appears above-right) truly understood the double role of fantasy in the tenuous construction of reality and, indeed, in the human dilemma itself.

Of course cats don't care about reality -- only you humans do!


Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Tache:
Cat to cat...what the h*ll are you writing about? "Fantasy and reality are not separate ontologies..." Yeh, (yawn) fantasy found, fantasy lost...blah, blah.

What about "I think therefore I am"? And since I am, I can kill that bug, mouse or other small moving object over there and eat it. Now that's real.

It sounds like you're trying to be one of those pseudo intellectuals like Chet. I think humans call what you're doing intellectual masturbation. Since I'm neutered I really don't understand the true meaning of masturbation. But I believe the term intellectual masturbation is a more abstract reference to one who is full of BS

Get real cat!
P.S. I once ate a live bird whole and spit out the feet.

4:20 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

You write beautifully, Tache. If only Chette had put this kind of insight into his undergraduate theory papers he could have ended up with a better grade than "B."

Gumby -- ! With that kind of name I can well believe you DO have bird feet hanging out of your ugly feline maw.

Tache, pleeze tell Chette I am sorry I made fun of his kitchen units. It's just that I always thought urban metrosexuals had PERFECT kitchens and household appliances.

Anyway, it's something I always phantasized about.

(Also, I just bought a coffee-maker for $180, so my ego saw it as an opportunity to score a few cheap points.)

I need therapy (or a bird to torture).


5:01 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear SotFls:

Chet is having a seizure because, in one post, you accused him of receiving a B AND of being a meterosexual.

I love you.


7:50 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hello Humans and animals (don't quite understand the difference):

I'm sure Chet received many, many B's that none of you know about...HMMMM, like right...Honors Society?

Bletrosexuals do uhhh, manipulate the truth?

See SotFIs, the word for Chet is Bletrosexual NOT Metrosexual. Blets are gay but Mets think they are not...(I won't go any farther with that). Tache, I do hope you'll back me up here instead of changing sides like you always seem to do.

And SotFIs, BTW, why would the name Gumby lead you to believe that I eat birds? Gumby is that nice green clay figure who never gets in any trouble. Remember?

Best to all,
Gumby (that adorable, sweet, loving, handsome orange cat)

10:09 PM  
Blogger Brett Walter said...

What is going on here? Chet are you a complete nutter? Why not have a normal blog devoted to fantasy sports or English soccer, like a regular person. Instead you're mumbling on about Freud and cats and other gay crap. Come on, guy, get with the program.


11:43 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Chet I always worry about you. Now I don't like Tache or Brett. I'm sure, at least when it comes to Brett there is something I don't know, and is some how redeaming about Brett(prove it to me bitch--directed to Brett).

However, Chet can only say you're a saint when it comes to that hairball of a cat of yours. Why else would you continue to care for such an ungrateful, and, quite frackly, hateful animal.

DEIRDRE, soak that ungratefull feline!

Lea, in her simple ways, sends her love. I do too.

8:55 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Dear Jason--

I don't know what to say about Tache. She somehow always manages to hack on to here, even though I change the password. I never even knew, before this blog, that Tache could type, much less that she has such erudite opinions about art and, apparently, psychoanalysis. I sort of like reading her intellectual comments; I just wish she would not be so insulting!! I've tried to talk to her about it in person, but she does not respond.

As for Brett, I have stopped apologizing for him. In every family there's the embarrassing cousin -- Brett is that cousin. He likes the sound of his own voice, and there's little that can be done to stop him. You know how it goes: you can take the boy out of Wyoming, but you can't take the Wyoming out of the boy.


p.s. Hi Lea!

10:04 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

OK, for the record yall… This why the South Lost the War of Southern Aggression! Your all too simple!

Evidently it is time for me to speak TRUTH TO POWER!

If Chet has any of you believing that he is a “Saint”, then you are all crazy. (Clearly this comment is not Jason H,) because u know this man is crazy and not a saint, unless of course we are talking about an alternate universe, where up is down, black is white, and Bush is competent (Oh I forgot it is an alternate Universe because Bush is still relatively popular down in the Confederate States).

Yes I know Chet going all over Atlanta doing his best Vivian Leigh imitation in Streetcar Named Desire bit of … “Oh I have cancer… & I am relying on the kindness of strangers” shtick, but do not believe him, nor should feel sorry for him for the cancer bit either!
(Sorry Chet this is for you own good!) You see Chet is evil and as a result the cancer has no chance against him. It’s true.

Now in regards to some comments about Chet’s long suffering parents, who gave him a foot message. I have 2 comments:

1. Has anyone seen your feet before! Hell, his toes are so long, that not only can he write with then, he can type! It’s freakish and a sign of the devil is u ask me, either that or the elusive proof of the missing link!
2. Despite this Both Carla & I have been very attentive & I stand by Carla earlier statement in which she said that… “As you know, Henry and I choose to practice tough love when dealing with you. We are not interested in rubbing your feet or serving you four desserts or pretending that we like your creepy cat. We are interested in yelling at you to move your chemo bag so there's more room for us on the sofa. We love you, goddammit. And that's how we show it.”

Frankly, I don’t know why I should bother helping you rebels down there, especially after you gave us Newt Gingrich, George Bush Sr , Shrub & the rest of the Bush Klan, Jesse Helms, Tom Delay, George Wallace, Strom Thurman, Jerry Farwell, Bill Frist, etc, etc., but I also recognize there are a few good persons who have lived in the South (Barbara Jordon, Ann Richards, & Jimmy Carter)**

But if you truly want to understand Chet then you should all go watch the “Family Guy”. I have it on inside information that the young baby in that show was modeled after Chet as a baby.

Keep the faith,

PS: & Deirdre I am shocked, you should know better!

** It should be noted that most of the people I had to come up with have died….

11:44 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

For all of you who don't know him, Henry has a little problem with the South.


9:14 AM  
Blogger Brett Walter said...

Hey Chet, I thought Shatterer was going to be on here. Not a bunch of your fancy friends talking about cats. Now I have one of them coming on to me (Jason). Well hell, I should have learned my lessons long ago. By the way, why are you so jealous of me?

2:19 PM  
Blogger Brett Walter said...

ps - Maybe all of your little friends might like to know that you use the "Inter-Nets" to send pictures of Britney Spears' naked goodies to people like me, who do not approve of such vile content.

2:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...


I would imagine that the only way in hell Jason would hit on you would be with a 2X4.

Which I would thoroughly enjoy watching.


2:49 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

It seems that you've all digressed from the original post: Tache's brilliant discussion of the ontologies of human fantasy and reality. I don't agree with Gumby. In fact, I don't think Gumby is the brightest cat bulb on the planet.

Tache should be responding to this blither but I think she might be traumatized and it might be my fault.

See...Deirdre gets separation anxiety when she has to leave her cats for any extended period of time. She knew that she could only bring one of us (six would have caused some problems on the plane and at the B&B). Since I'm so well-behaved she decided to bring me. I'm Dizzy, named after Dizzy Gillespie (renound jazz musician for all you human ignorami who don't know that name).

All was going well. Chet didn't suspect a thing. And Wendy didn't even notice me at dinner, although she's sharper than Chet so I'm kind of surprised. (I was in Deirdre's purse).

After dinner Chet wanted to show Deirdre his apartment. I really wanted to see Chet's apartment so I snuck out briefly while Chet was in the bathroom and Deirdre was looking around. WELL...there was me the evil eye. I really wanted to discuss her blog but she cut me off and told me to get out -- that this was HER territory. So I just left my 'mark' on the wall between the living room and bedroom and she ran under the bed. I got back in Deirdre's purse quickly. Noone even suspected a thing.

My guess is that she's completely traumatized. But someone needed to put her in her place...other than intellectually. Clearly Chet hasn't been very sucessful.

I'm surprised Chet didn't smell anything. But Chet, I loved your apartment and don't worry the smell does go away...eventually. BTW, I had a great time in Atlanta.


4:51 PM  
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